C

OK you guys, so basically the first thing you should know about the C programming language is that it is fucked beyond belief. It was designed in the late 60s, when computers were fucking slow as hell, and half the programmers were high ALL THE TIME. Dennis Ritchie, one of the inventors of C, definitely had to be high most of the time. Seriously, just like, go fucking read some of the shit he wrote back then. He tries to sound like he's all mysterious and wizardly, but really he's just a fucking pothead or something. Maybe. I dunno. Anyway, enjoy fucking around with header files, buffer overflows, and various other shit that only a 40-year-old, almost-assembly programming language can offer. yeah, I heard C is “fast” and shit, so maybe that's good. Whatever, do whatever the fuck you want.

The above being said, C is still pretty much the common language amongst programmers, and despite its faults is beloved amongst them. C is taught in every single computer science major, all computer scientists know C, most exploits are published in C, and therefore reading it will be of great use if you have any intention of doing more serious programming.

The main aim of this tutorial is to provide you with the knowledge needed to not only write your own programs, but also to correct errors in others' programs.

A compiler is a program which converts source code into machine code. Humans cannot read machine code and computers cannot read C. Think of it as a translator between you and someone else that doesn't speak your language.

Any other operating systems will be added on demand.

The first step will be to acquire the tools required for programming and compiling. There are many different ways to do this; but since it's likely this is your first experience of C, I'll go with the simplest.

Windows C compilers are ubiquitous and many of them do the exact same job. Unfortunately, most of them cost assloads of cash for the full version. Here's a listing of integrated development environments that support C on Windows, along with download links for the free ones.

• Microsoft Visual Studio Express - you want the C++ version.
• Dev-C++ - GNU free, it uses an ancient version of GCC, so beware.
• wxDev-C++ - GNU free, like Dev-C++ but you can use any compiler you want (i.e. a more modern version of GCC).
• Code::Blocks - GNU free, supports plugins.
• Eclipse - Eclipse handles more than just C/C++ through its extensive plugins system.
• MonoDevelop also provides supports .Net frameworks. ←- b0rked, there's no username/password to the ftp
• NetBeans - it isn't just for Java anymore.

My recommendation would probably be to go with MonoDevelop, which supports the full .Net stack without shelling out for Visual Studio. That said, Visual Studio does have its perks, particularly when you're using functions listed in Windows (which, generally speaking, you shouldn't do).