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--- news:gophers-are-back [2026/04/01 13:15] – Humphrey Boa-Gart
+++ news:gophers-are-back [2026/04/02 01:28] (current) – Humphrey Boa-Gart
@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
 ====== Gophers Are Back, Watch Your Step For Gopher Holes ======
-If you're walking around the grounds of the Institute, watch out for **gopher holes**. They seem to pop up everywhere this time of year. The Institute is not responsible if you fall into one of them and get hurt.
+[{{ :hazards:openholes.jpg?300|SAFE RETURN NOT GUARANTEED}}]
-People tell me I should get the holes filled in, that it's "unsafe" to have Port 70 open in 2026 because it's unencrypted. But encryption isn't going to save you from not paying attention. Just watch where you're going, and you wont fall into the holes. I've got Gopher protocol support to finish baking into [[github>humphreyboagart/grackle|Grackle]] and [[github>noveltylanterns/raven|Raven]]. I don't have time to be dealing with landscaping and moving dirt around. Stop bothering me about the holes.
+If you're walking around the grounds of the Institute, watch out for [[tools:gopher|gopher holes]]. They seem to pop up everywhere this time of year. The Institute is not responsible if you fall into one of them and get hurt.
- --- //[[user:hbg|Humphrey Boa-Gart]] 2026/04/01 13:15//
+People tell me I should get the holes filled in, that it's "unsafe" to have Port 70 open in 2026 because it's unencrypted. But encryption isn't going to save you from not paying attention. Just watch where you're going, and you wont fall into the holes.
+I've got Gopher protocol support to finish baking into [[github>humphreyboagart/grackle|Grackle]] and [[github>noveltylanterns/raven|Raven]]. Then after that I have to get TLS working on the [[finger>lanterns.io|Finger]] protocol so we can try using it over [[radio:mesh|LoRa networks]]. I don't have time to be dealing with landscaping and moving dirt around. Stop bothering me about the holes.
+**UPDATE:** Someone from Canada emailed me and said I should [[https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/calgary/strychnine-emergency-use-alberta-saskatchewan-9.7148000|poison the gophers]] with strychnine. First off, war is coming and if I had any stockpiles of strychnine it would be getting sold at a lofty markup to mercenaries & guerrilla insurgents. Secondly that's just fucking barbaric. The gophers aren't hurting anyone. Canadians are depraved.
+ --- //[[user:hbg|Humphrey Boa-Gart]] 2026/04/01//
 {{tag>News}}

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